For the Lord of hosts has a day against all that is proud and lofty, against all that is lifted up and high; against all the cedars of Lebanon, lofty and lifted up; and against all the oaks of Bashan; against all the high mountains, and against all the lofty hills; against every high tower, and against every fortified wall; against all the ships of Tarshish, and against all the beautiful craft.
The haughtiness of people shall be humbled, and the pride of everyone shall be brought low; and the Lord alone will be exalted on that day.
It is often good to remember to stay ‘right sized’; to remember that we are no better or worse than anyone else, and therefore can learn about being a single parent from anyone, including traditional parents, our own parents, and even those who are not parents at all!
I have had some people put me down for being a single father, telling me that it was important for a child to have two parents, and asked how I could “…walk away from my marriage…”, when there was a child involved? Then there are other people who have wanted to put me up on a pedestal for the “…sacrifices you have made…” in order to raise my daughter.
While the first annoyed me and the second fed my ego, neither was correct. Those who were upset that I could not save my marriage, did not understand that it was un-savable, and that I get along better now with my daughter’s mother now better than when we were married! Those who want to praise me don’t understand that I am just doing what I am supposed to do: take care of my child, and raise her as best I could. They also do not know the moments of frustration and anger that I have felt as I have raised my daughter; or that as a single parent I have had many of the same struggles as any other parent.
As single parents it is important to stay right-sized, to remember that in the eyes of God we are all equal, all God’s children, and all loved…by our own perfect parent!
We need not be too hard on ourselves for not doing enough, nor should we break our arms to pat ourselves on the back…both cause too much stress. It is best to simply continue putting one foot in front of the other, taking one step at a time.
Staying right-sized helps us to stay humble and open to the suggestions of others, from professionals, to friends and family, as (I have found) we can use all the help we can get when raising our kids as single parents.
Let us Pray:
God, help us to stay right-sized, not to put ourselves down too low for our mistakes or struggles, and not to boost ourselves up to high, only to set ourselves up for a crash! Thank you that in your eyes we are all equal, all well loved children of God! Thank you for putting others in our lives to help us to carry on, and to keep moving forward, and to teach us how to manage the challenges of parenthood.